What I hope my kids learned in third grade…

Shelly Webb

May 1st. ushers in a sense of completion in my mind. The sound of lawnmowers, the smell of fresh-cut grass and the amount of spring cleaning remind me that another year of school is waning to an end.

I start thinking of “my kids” and how they will all be moving on and I wonder what exactly they will take with them to fourth grade, what have they learned this year. I refer to them as “my kids”, because they truly have become “mine”. When you spend five days a week with a child for nine months, you can’t help but become sucked into their life.

 I know all about them, I know their personalities, their strengths, and their weaknesses. I know how sensitive or tough they are and how they are going to react to whatever situation. I can predict their thought pattern, I know what motivates them and I know what shuts them down. I know who needs pushed and I know who needs built-up, before they can be pushed.

Academically they have ALL grown, some have shown remarkable growth and some average growth, but overall they have all grown and learned lots of things.

For instance, they have increased their vocabulary significantly, they know many Greek and Latin Roots, they can compare and contrast two texts, they know about fables, folktales and myths, they can write an opinion, they can identify nouns, verbs, adjective, adverbs and pronouns, they have increased their reading level and they are well-versed in various genres and authors of their time.

And all that is great…but it’s really not the most important things they have learned. What my kids have learned that matters most of all is that they now have one more adult in their life that genuinely cares about them. They have learned that I believe in them, and that I understand some of the tough circumstances in their young lives. They have learned that I am available to listen, talk or help them out.

They have all learned that MISTAKES are NECESSARY in school and more importantly in life, and that every mistake is a chance to learn and that no one truly ‘learns’ without making mistakes. They have learned that they do not have to be perfect and that their teacher is VERY FAR from perfect.

They have learned that they are free to mess up, to become frustrated, to lose a book, to forget a book, to fail a test, and to re-take a test. They are free to make choices, to share with each other, to have a disagreement, to say ‘I’m sorry’ and to grow. They have also learned the one thing they can NEVER do… and that is to, “give up on learning”. Even when the text looks too hard or the book looks too long, they know they have to dig deep and persevere. They have learned that “hard work” far, far outweighs being smart and that they all have the ability to be hard-workers.

I have taught them how important a good work ethic is when it comes to getting a job. They know that this one valuable character trait can take them much further than the number attributed to their IQ score.

We have also delved into various college websites to learn that college really can be for everybody. Degrees in programs like ‘Wildlife Conservation’, ‘Mechanical Engineering’, ‘Art’ and ‘Sports and Fitness Management’ grabbed the curiosity of a few that had little interest in college until then. The smile on their faces and new enthusiasm for their future was priceless.

 I believe my kids have learned the content standards, which is vitally important for their success in future grades. But to be honest…my mission is so much bigger than that.

When that last day of third grade comes and goes, I hope it comes and goes with life long memories full of magic and grace. I hope that years from now a random thought back to third grade brings a smile to their faces. I hope they remember the prize box, the music we played, the debates and skits we did, the suckers, the tootsie rolls, and I hope they think of me and realize that Mrs. Webb really, truly cared about them and their future…because I do!

          

More than a doctor…

A Pediatrician is technically a doctor that treats children. He or she is there for the first check-up and immunizations; and then sticks around for the next 18 years overseeing the health of the child.

My Pediatrician, Dr. Tiberio, stuck around a tad longer and was there to welcome our first grandchild into the world, however at our last well-baby appointment he broke the news that he is planning to retire in May. The room was suddenly deflated and the mood in my heart turned gloomy. I kept telling myself, “Don’t cry…everyone retires…you’re being ridiculous, don’t cry”…but as usual, ‘myself’, didn’t listen and soon the tears were flowing.

For the past twenty-five years this gentle, caring man has been there, like a quiet member of my family, one that stays back in the shadows and causes no drama. Over the years he has treated so much more than ear-aches and viruses. He has treated my worries, my over-reacting and my fears; all with a calm and reassuring voice.

Statements such as, “No, Kennedy will NOT nurse forever,”, “Yes Katilyn WILL be potty-trained” and, “The vaccines are safe, please don’t worry”, only scratch the surface of the candor and wisdom he provided me.

Number one, he “remembers” my mom, and if you are someone that has lost your mom, then you know how important it is when someone “remembers” her. My mom accompanied me to every pediatric visit until she died, when Katilyn was twenty-months old. After that I went alone to the check-ups and sick visits, but Dr. T always commented about “how proud” my mom would be of Katilyn, and that he knew how badly I missed her and how hard it was for me. I seldom left with dry eyes those days, but eventually things got better.

Then when my dad was diagnosed with cancer and died within just a few months I remember telling Dr. Tiberio that I really should have insisted on chemotherapy WITH the radiation, instead we opted to do radiation first and then add chemo later, and my dad never made it to one chemo treatment. I felt like it was the wrong choice and that I should have been more on my game so to speak. He listened quietly and then said the magic words that lifted that burden from my heart. “My dad was in a similar situation,” he shared. “I insisted on chemo and radiation at the same time, and you know what Shell, he didn’t live any longer than your dad”. Those words made everything better, as strange as that may sound; I had just been granted permission NOT to replay the ‘what ifs’ over and over in my mind.

My Pediatrician was caring, patient and spent TONS of time with my kids during their appointments, he didn’t only treat them, he treated me. He treated me with kindness and guidance; he treated me with respect and compassion. He was a doctor, but he was also a husband, a dad of four kids and in recent years a grandfather. He allowed all those experiences to become an intricate part of how he doctored and cared for his patients.

I feel privileged and blessed to have gotten to know him over the years. I feel especially grateful that he was able to take care of my girls and usher them into adulthood and that first appointment with their “grown-up doctor”. I love the fact that he was there to greet my little grandson and take care of him for the first 18 months of his life.

I hope he realizes that his life’s work is so much more than the medical aspect; he has been an emotional support, a friend, a counselor and wonderful advice giver. No one is perfect, not even doctors, but this one was pretty close. My wish is for his retirement to be full of promise, good health, family and prosperity, he deserves it!

End of the Day Reflection—

Shelly Webb

As the last voices fade from the hallway and the sound of a lagging school bus passes beneath my window, I automatically start to reflect.

The realization of how tired I am kicks in; I didn’t sleep well last night and I wonder if I really gave it my all today. I wonder if I will sleep tonight, I wonder if it’s my age or just my mind not shutting off that keeps me tossing and turning. As I recount the events of the day I remind myself how well most of my students did on the ‘Idiom’ quiz, I feel like they finally understand what “feeling under the weather” and “giving someone the cold shoulder” actually means… although I’m not sure exactly how essential this information will prove to be in their futures. They also did a great job using task cards to ‘make conclusions’, but again…not sure if this will help them land a job one day, unless they are intuitive enough to conclude exactly what to say in the interview and when to stop talking altogether.

Then I reflect about the day’s events that didn’t have anything to do with ‘content’ or ‘learning targets’. I helped one girl make a bracelet out of construction paper and staples during inside recess, she loved it. I received an awesome handmade card from another at the end of the day. I listened about a new puppy someone received for Christmas and PATIENTLY listened to another student’s very detailed story about what ALL she received for Christmas. I pulled a tooth, refereed a dispute between three very DRAMATIC nine-year-old girls, and convinced two students that received Cs on the ‘Idiom’ quiz that they absolutely did an amazing job, which they did! They both loved the sticker on their paper and proudly showed them like medals of honor. I had lunch duty too, so I ate with my kids today and ended up splitting my Pizzaburger with one. He was excited… I was full.

I wonder if making connections with kids is just as important as making them grow. I think the two are actually intertwined. I want my students to learn to their full potential, but I want them to feel a connection with me that is rooted in the knowledge that all things aside, they, personally matter most. They matter more than a STAR score, more than a test score, more than a grade card or a reading level. I want them to know that I genuinely care about the daily events that matter to them, and trust me, in third grade there are MANY daily events that matter!

Not that this diminishes learning; I know how important the content is and how critical learning to read, analyze and think about a situation are to growing and achieving in the third grade. We compare and contrast everything under the sun; we use context clues daily to figure out what new words mean, we can identify the way a text is organized, the character traits and setting of stories, we write our opinions and expository texts, and we work on a hundred other things.

But in the big scheme of life……I teach, AND…I listen to stories about puppies, I hug crying, drama filled third graders, I high-five kids for achieving Cs and make sure they know a hard C means so much more than an easy A, I laugh at their knock-knock jokes even when they’re not funny and I referee…oh, and I pull teeth (often). And I’m betting years from now, they may not remember all the content I have taught, but they will remember the hugs, the high fives and all the little day-to-day things that have nothing to do with learning, but everything to do with life, at least I hope they will. J

Learning to be a SuperHERO

Shelly Webb

         

          Being a mother of two girls I developed a deep knowledge of the many woes and triumphs of the Disney Princesses. I was greeted daily by posters of ‘Sleeping Beauty’, ‘Belle’, ‘Princess Jasmine’, ‘Cinderella’ and ‘Snow White’. We owned every VHS in which these fine ladies were featured and read lots of stories about their exciting love lives. I also gained a keen understanding about ‘Barbie’, ‘Skipper’, ‘Ken’, all the American Girl dolls and Polly Pocket. The greatest lesson that I learned through this was that I should have purchased stock in Disney and the other companies pushing these products because then today I could look at all those purchases as an ‘investment’ and rest easy. Instead I find myself trying to justify those purchases by interesting my one-year-old grandson in Barbie’s little skateboard or Jasmine’s flying carpet, which I can tell, annoys my son-in-law.

          I was blessed with my girls and they are beautiful and amazing. I am glad I have a grandSON today because I realize I missed out on a lot of boy stuff when my girls were growing up. For example, I don’t know a thing about the ‘Power Rangers’, the teenage mutant turtles, or the “X-Men”…are they good or evil by the way? And if not for my awesome friend, Sandy (who had two boys) I would have missed out on the most important and life changing men besides my husband…BATMAN and SPIDERMAN!

          My girls were not into superheroes when they were young, and as a result I turned down many movie invites. Thank goodness the ‘Dark Knight’ had three parts and I finally relented and agreed to accompany my friend to part-three. I was reluctant and went into it thinking, “ugh I hope this isn’t a long movie”! BUT… I not only loved it, I saw it two more times in the next couple weeks and bought the first two movies of the series. I also bought the Spiderman Movies, saw Superman and Iron Man. This completely changed me into a SuperHERO freak, not quite on the same level as Sheldon Cooper…but close.

          Now imagine my excitement when our principal announced that the theme for Warsaw Elementary this year will be: “Be Someone’s SuperHERO” H=Helpful, E=Energetic, R=Respectful, O=Optimistic! How awesome is this?

          A SuperHERO spends a lot of time ‘rescuing people’ and who needs rescued more than kids? Some may need, rescued from boredom, some from a bad day, some, from a forgotten lunch sitting back on the kitchen counter, some from lost homework or a failed test. Some may even need rescued from ‘themselves’, or a bad attitude or arrogance or bullying or being a bully. The point is we all need rescued from time to time and I will be in a perfect position to rescue and make a difference.

          A SuperHERO is someone you admire and trust, I hope my students will admire and trust me. Creating a positive relationship with them honestly means more to me than the curriculum, whether that’s wrong or right, I’m not sure, but relationship has to be the number one goal in my opinion. Without relationship, respect and trust, why would they even care to listen to anything I have to say?

          When you believe and know that someone genuinely cares about you, you will listen to them; when someone takes a risk for you, you will respect them; when you really matter to someone, they become your SuperHERO.

          I am excited because even though I don’t have this ‘common core’ things completely down and I am still learning about assessments, technology, differentiation and a ton of other education terms---I’ve got the SuperHERO background completely covered!

And just like Batman I’m sure I will encounter a ‘joker’ or two, like Superman I’m sure I will meet my Lex Luther…..but I have one thing Batman, Superman and all the others lacked… I have ‘a no recess card’, so I’m sure I’ll be just fine until I win any little villains over with my super charm!

Reflecting on my soon to be--graduate 

With the shadow graduation looming on the horizon, I simultaneously feel mixed emotions of pride, joy and sadness. First, I have been very blessed to have two unbelievably awesome daughters. Tonight, however I am reflecting on how quickly time has passed between the day I dropped Kennedy off at preschool and now.

I remember picking her up at preschool the first day and how excited she was to show me the little playground. She wore a Scooby Doo denim dress and pony-tails. I also remember the day she came home from preschool and proudly explained that she had gone to the bathroom, and had NOT yelled for Mrs. Coffman to “come and wipe”. The confidence she had after that accomplishment was amazing!

When she was in First Grade my oldest daughter, Katilyn cut ALL her bangs off. It was right before Christmas pictures and I was livid, but Kennedy’s attitude was priceless, “I have to go to school until they grow back Mom, now stop crying”, she ordered as I sat on the bathroom floor threatening to cut Katilyn’s hair too. I think facing the world with NO bangs, not a one, gave her even more confidence than the whole wiping thing in preschool.

In Second grade for career day, she wanted to be President of the United States. “There’s no costume for that,” I told her. “All I need is a badge,” she explained. So she dressed in a little plaid coat dress, all buttoned up and wore a “Vote Kennedy Webb for President 2032” badge, (which I still have). We ordered them online and she passed one out to everyone in the class and again, her confidence grew a little more.

In addition to confidence she began to develop a lot of compassion. She always stuck up for the underdog, she tried to right every wrong and felt a sense of responsibility to make things better. She was on a mission to be the ‘fixer’ of all problems and troubles. This was great when she was successful, but tough when she wasn’t.  

“I don’t want to be 11”, she told me on her eleventh birthday. I remember telling her that she was silly and had to grow up, but that she would always be my baby. Inside though… I was thinking the same thing… “I didn’t want her to be 11 either”. I missed the rustling sound the diaper would make when she would run away from me with something in her hand that she shouldn’t have. I missed how she only wore one sock, and hid in the cupboards and watched the “Wizard of Oz” non-stop.

Through Junior High and High School I watched helplessly as the last shred of my “little girl” disappeared into a beautiful, strong, somewhat opinionated young woman. It’s amazing to me how she can light up a room by just walking in; or how her very odd sense of humor can send people into hysterics. “She’s a weird one,” her dad whispers to me, “wonder where she gets it from” he winks. I could only hope she gets some of her characteristics from me.

But regardless, I am so proud of the person she has become and the passion she possesses. I know I have been given a great privilege to ‘watch’ this very special person change and grow into someone I want to be more like. It’s strange, when you become a mom, you always think in terms of “teaching and molding” this new little person so they can make it in life. But I feel like I am the one that has been “taught and molded” by her. I pray I am blessed with good health so I can continue to watch the wonderful, unfolding of her story. I’m sure it will be a classic/ comedy/ drama/ academy award winning saga.

‘will the test count against us’?

 Shelly Webb

          “Will the test count against us,” a third-grader asked me when we were reviewing for the upcoming PARCC Math Assessment? She thought this was a simple question and wanted a simple answer. I told her that it wouldn’t really count “against” her, but it would just show a picture of what all she had learned. But wow, was that a loaded question!

          After I answered her question then my own mind started racing…”will the test count against ME, the teacher”, “will I be viewed as a failure if 80% of my students don’t pass it”? I continued mentally processing, “I have 25 kids so five can fail, which five will that be”? I actually looked around the room and quickly counted…I saw potentially seven students that may have a tough time passing this test. Then I thought, “what if seven don’t pass, what percentage is that of 25”!

          I could have continued in that thought pattern all day long, but I forced myself to STOP.

It is a stressful concept to grasp when you realize that twenty-five, eight or nine-year-old kids that you have taught for a year will be taking an OAA, PARCC, STAR and SLO to measure their growth and achievement. Whether I like it or not, test scores do reflect back on me. But despite this, I am trying to focus on the fact that what I do every day is what defines me as a teacher more so than a test score.

          In my opinion, the biggest measure I am defined by is how my students perceive me and the relationship I have with them. I want my students to ‘know’ that I care and think about them more than the six hours a day I have them in class. I want to be defined by the fact that I know my kids on a personal level, I know their strengths, their weaknesses and their personality. I know how to get them motivated and what shuts them down. I know their learning style; I know who gets it better ‘visually’ and who gets it better ‘by listening’. I know which kids prefer ‘hands on’ learning and which ones don’t. I can tell by the look on their faces, if there’s a problem or concern. It’s amazing how well you get to know someone that you work together with every day and that is exactly what we do…work together.

          I realize that my student’s attitude towards learning will define me much more than the score they receive on a test. I want to see myself through their eyes. I love it at the end of the day, when the one child that I’ve had to speak to three or four times or dock some recess time from, hugs me bye and still says, “You’re the best teacher”. Now I’m not sure if he really means it or if he is just trying to make amends for a rough day, but I love it because even though I’ve scolded him, he still ‘knows’ I genuinely care about him and I am up for a hug.

          I want to be defined by the expectations I set, the tears I prevent and the ones I wipe away. I want to be defined by the math concepts they finally understand, the number of books they read, the narratives they write and the critical thinking skills they develop. I want to be defined by their laughter when I make a lame joke (and most of my jokes are pretty lame). I want to be defined for how I make my kids feel about learning and themselves.

          I full well understand that test scores are vitally important and those scores will be a reflection on how well I have presented and taught the standards. But I do realize it is just one piece of the overall picture. There are so many other issues and goals during the course of a year, and the individual child that I see and interact with every day is my top priority. I want to always see the ‘child’ and not a potential test score. Every student deserves that and every teacher deserves it as well.   

Biggest Thief of Life, 'TIME'

 by Shelly Webb

The greatest thief to ever burglarize the human race does so without raising a single weapon or breaking into a single building, home, garage or store. He is a quiet thief, subtle, cunning and undetected. We base much of our life on him and allow his constraints to prioritize most of our days. His name is ‘time’ and he alone has perpetrated more crimes against humanity than most of us realize.

The problem with ‘time’ is you don’t understand his power until it’s too late. You might notice him occasionally lurking at your bathroom mirror. You’re brushing your teeth or applying mascara when you suddenly catch the glimpse of a small line beginning to form at the corner of your eye.

But, you’re busy. You glance at the line, wonder what it is and how it got there and then rush out on your way.

You pick up your three-year-old at preschool and celebrate the fact that she can finally write her own name, all the while the thief, ‘time’, smirks in the backseat. Only he realizes the significance of this accomplishment. Only he sees how quickly Kindergarten will come, junior high and graduation. You’re just happy she can write her name…finally because…it’s about time.

Summer days seem shorter, months begin to fly by and you start understanding that ‘time’ is moving at a much faster pace than he once did. Then, one day you reach for the phone book and find yourself squinting. You ask your high schooler, yes the one that used to be a preschooler a short time ago, “why are they making the font in the phone books so small now”? And in response to your question, ‘time’ laughs out loud and adds another line to your face. So you buy reading glasses and wrinkle cream and hope for the best, but the thief continues to rob and steal. You find yourself getting your hair colored every five weeks now instead of six and choosing comfortable shoes over fashionable ones. And ‘time’ is humored by your state of denial and vain efforts to slow him down.

Birthdays slip by, anniversaries come and grandparents die, pictures are taken, videos created and 28 New Year’s Eve parties later…you’re a grandma!

And at this point, you start to develop a little more fear and respect for ‘time’ and his little game. You know now that all the events in life, the joyous and the sad are presented in part, by this great thief. He is the uninvited, unseen guest at every dinner and every vacation. He introduces us to new vocabulary like cholesterol, annuity, retirement and ‘son-in-law’.

Ironically, we spend most of life trying to manage ‘time’ only to actual be managed by him. Time to work, time to rest, time to spend with friends, time for kids, time for fun, time to plan, time to learn time management and eventually just coveting time for bed. It’s hard to believe that such a tiny word, ‘time’, can possess so much power and influence over life.

‘Time’ is a thief, there is little doubt about that…but for every antagonist there is a protagonist and this story is no different. Another tiny word…called ‘memories’ is able to diminish ‘time’ and weaken his cold grip.

‘Memories’ are the ultimate weapon against ‘time’, because they are actually created by ‘time’; something ‘time’ probably hates in the same way Voldemort hated that he transposed some his power to Harry when he tried to kill him.

‘Memories’ are powerful and can be replayed over and over in your heart and head where ‘time’ cannot touch. ‘Memories’ can capture ‘time’ and hold him in perspective. ‘Memories’ can transcend the damage ‘time’ can do into a glorious time of reminiscing. ‘Time’ may be a thief, but ‘Memories’ bring back everything ‘time’ steals and does so with laughter and joy.

I believe that the memories we make with the time we are given are priceless treasures that cannot be stolen forever. They are always there, embedded deep within our hearts, whether or not we can express them or recall them, they are there bridging the gaps that ‘time’ creates. Spend your time wisely in 2015 and make great memories whether you have the time or not.